"At least I have a boyfriend!"

Seriously, how often do you hear this pathetic line as a comeback?



So you have a boyfriend. Con-fucking-gratulations. Do honestly think that your boyfriend means a rat's ass to me? In what state of delusion does anyone really give a shit that you have a boyfriend? That's right. None. Zero. No one cares.

Really, I'm not an evil witch who despises romance, but using the fact that you're in a relationship:
a) Does not make you seem more desirable than the other party.
b) Does not make the other party jealous.
c) Does not make you look cooler.
d) Makes you look like a self centered bitch with DPD.


And please, if you think this is my way of justifying why I don't have a boyfriend, it's called standards. Because telling people you've been in 30 relationships doesn't make you sound cool, it makes you sound like either a desperate douchebag, a slut, or just a bad girlfriend who can't take commitment.

You should learn from this, because if anything, you saying "at least I have a boyfriend" is a fucking sure sign that you shouldn't. Because you should die. In a fire.